Social & Interpersonal Skills

My Boss Always Disagrees With Me: Why And How To Deal With It

You want to have a positive working relationship with your boss. You have to report to this person every day, but constantly disagreeing with them can make you miserable.

Instead of complaining that my boss always disagrees with me, learn exactly why you and your boss don’t see eye to eye. Working with a boss who has a completely different style from you can be constructive if you both learn to work together.

Why Does My Boss Always Disagree with Me?

Your Boss Wants to Implement Change

It’s hard to work with a boss who is excited about change when you are satisfied with the way things are. Change is never easy and could be contributing to your disagreements.

In these situations, it’s important to build credibility. If your only complaint is that your boss has a different approach to things, you may need to simply comply with their way of doing things.

If you’re refusing to try any of their new ideas, you’re going to be ignored when you do speak up. You won’t have anything to back up your case, and you’ll turn out looking like the employee who’s stuck in their ways, rather than a worker who wants to find the best way to achieve the company’s goals.

Once you try things their way, you can point out specific areas in which the old ways are best and be able to make logical comparisons. Your boss will respect this approach more than they will your flat-out resistance.

You Don’t See the Likelihood of Success

You may be afraid of failure. You aren’t content with following your boss’s plan simply to keep peace when you see a possibility of the plan failing.

If you’re afraid the new plan will cost the company money and possibly lose clients, your boss’s new ideas will feel way too risky. It can be reassuring to talk with your boss and make sure you are both working towards the same goals.

The best thing to do is ask specific questions about your role in any new project and what the exact goals are. You may find that your boss understands the risks, but simply wants you to try.

On the other hand, you may find out that your boss has drastically different goals from you. If their plans feel impossible and you dread going to work each day, you may need to consider finding a new job. You should never be put in a position where you feel like you’re being asked to perform miracles.

You Have a Micromanager for a Boss

Your constant disagreements with your boss may be because they don’t give you the freedom needed to do your job. When you do take a chance to do things your way, this boss makes you start over and do it their way.

Be honest with yourself when it comes to accusing your boss of micromanaging. Are they truly being overly controlling or is their behavior a result of your previous actions? Have your projects been poorly executed, left unfinished, or have missed deadlines?

If it is brought on by your behavior, you’ll need to buckle down and do things the boss’s way for a while. Work on exceeding their expectations. Once you have regained their trust, you’ll be able to once again make suggestions and present your ideas for projects.

If you’ve been doing the best you can at your job, your boss could actually be micromanaging. Explain to them that you want to make a bigger contribution by taking initiative. Listen carefully to what they have to say about doing this.

Read More: 12 Examples Of Micromanagement At Work [with Infographic]  

What to do When Your Boss Disagrees with You

Having an argumentative boss isn’t fun. While trying to figure out the reason for their behavior, learn how to react properly to their outbursts.

Don’t Argue Back

Don’t escalate an argument, no matter how angry or humiliating your boss is. Stay calm and talk in a quiet voice to de-escalate the situation. Shouting back increases their anger and gives them a reason to use disciplinary measures.

Distance Yourself

If you feel like you’re going to lose your temper, remove yourself from the argument. Take a lunch break or stay at your desk and work on a project.

If your boss is always angry with you, try avoiding them when possible. Only talk to them when it’s absolutely necessary.

Consider Their Perspective

Put yourself in their shoes and think about the concerns they may have and what they need to get done. This helps you understand their stress and why they are so easily angered.

Once you have an idea of the problems they have, you can find ways to lighten their load. You could offer to take on some assignments that they usually take care of. Your boss will gain confidence in your abilities and may stop bullying you.

Know Your Boss’s Triggers

Look for a pattern to their anger. Is your boss most upset at the end of the day or is it after they meet with their boss? They may be taking out their frustrations on you over other situations.

Watch to see if they are angrier on specific days or at certain times of day. Once you identify the boss’s triggers, you can avoid them during these moments.

When you are constantly wondering why my boss always disagrees with me, it can affect your performance at work. No one can do a good job when they are in constant fear of making the manager angry.

Take the time to figure out exactly what is causing this behavior and how to react in a positive way. This allows you to do your job without constantly feeling defeated. You may even turn your boss’s attitude around in the process.

About Author

Founder of With over 20 years of experience in HR and various roles in corporate world, Jenny shares tips and advice to help professionals advance in their careers. Her blog is a go-to resource for anyone looking to improve their skills, land their dream job, or make a career change.

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